DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have a dear friend who, every time I see her, insists on greeting me with a kiss on the lips. When I attempt to turn the other cheek (pun intended), she firmly redirects me back into position.

I am at a loss for how to address it. The only silver lining of masking up was that it provided a natural barrier, one she thankfully never tried to bypass.

But now, I find myself wondering: Should I start wearing masks again just for her? The thought of bringing it up feels awkward, especially since she is a warm, generous and genuinely kind person. I just suspect she may have missed a crucial lesson in personal boundaries.

GENTLE READER: The tried and trusted, “I don’t want you to catch anything,” said before your friend gets a chance to lock in, is an option. If, after doing this several times, she gets suspicious and accuses you of not being sick, Miss Manners suggests you say, “See? It’s working.”

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I enjoy theater and concerts and am in a position to treat others to these events. I usually purchase two tickets and invite a friend who might enjoy the event.

Unfortunately, some of these friends either do not respond, or say that they want to wait before answering, due to other anticipated commitments (work, children’s activities). In some cases, they accept, then cancel very close to the event.

In the former two cases, I follow up with an inquiry as to whether they are able to attend. If not, I then offer tickets to other friends. Since the cancellation is sometimes a day before, I am left to find another person to come at the last minute.

Often, I need to ask multiple people before finding one who is free. I am unsure how to word these invitations, as it will seem that the person was not my first choice. I am also unsure if I can contact several people at the same time to see who can attend, then “uninvite” the person who responds last.

I have often gone alone, but don’t like wasting a ticket that someone else may have used. What is the proper way to handle this?

GENTLE READER: Few people will argue with a free ticket. And reasonable people understand that they cannot always be your first choice, as long as you are equitable and transparent about it.

If you are asking one at a time, say without explanation, “I have a last-minute ticket to a Cloud Rap concert. Please let me know in the next hour if you are available.” And then move along to the next person accordingly. If offering several people at once, you can say, “Dibs go to the person who answers first.”

As for frequent last-minute cancelers? Miss Manners suggests you take them off the list entirely.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: When receiving unsolicited advice, with no intention of following it, is it preferable to simply reply “thank you” or to share one’s reasoning for dismissing the advice?

GENTLE READER: “Thank you” will suffice. Unless your intention is to argue, in which case, by all means let them in on your objection.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, gentlereader@missmanners.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: A graduate from a Seven Sisters college, who is the child of a doctor and a lawyer, sends out announcements with a link to her wish list for classroom items.

Is this a subtle request for gifts for herself, or truly a wish to stock her classroom?

GENTLE READER: Well ... Are the requests for construction paper and colored pencils? Or tennis bracelets and home appliances? Miss Manners suggests you check and deduce from there.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: When live artists are performing music during the dinner hour at a restaurant, is it rude not to applaud after each number, or should the music simply be considered part of the ambiance?

GENTLE READER: The artists will understand if you do not drop your fork every five minutes to stop and applaud. And the servers will appreciate it.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am lucky in that multiple friends of mine offered to host a baby shower for my upcoming arrival. I demurred with all of them and most of them dropped the subject.

Two friends insisted that they wanted to celebrate, and asked me if I would oblige, and I agreed. I provided a list of invitees and offered to drop some if it was too many, named my other friends who had offered to host as potential co-hosts if they so desired, and my registry info.

I did not provide any guidance for the event itself, as I am not the host. They suggested a nice restaurant for the event, which I said was fine.

I received an invitation at the same time as all other guests. The invitation specifies that each guest must pay for their own food and drink.

I am mortified at the prospect of being the guest of honor at an event at which guests must pay for themselves and are also expected to bring a gift. I realize that lunch for 15 at a restaurant is expensive, but would much rather have a casual gathering at a park with cake and bagels than this.

Should I ask them to cancel? Offer to pay the restaurant bill myself? Grin and bear it? I’m also wondering whether Miss Manners has guidance regarding what a guest of honor should do to prevent this from happening.

GENTLE READER: You had the right idea when you refused the offers in the first place. Miss Manners was wondering why you did so, but you know your friends better than she does.

If you can manage to pay for everyone, that would be the most gracious -- if expensive -- option. Perhaps just making the offer will shame your hosts into realizing what they have done. Perhaps not.

In general, guests of honor should try to suss out the scope of it all before agreeing to anything. “The Plaza is lovely, but way too expensive, I’m afraid. Perhaps a local cafe would be more manageable?” And if pressed, “I would be happy to contribute to the cost of wherever you choose; I just want to make sure that there is no burden on the guests.”

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, gentlereader@missmanners.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am on a team in an adult sports league. At the end of the season, the team decided to have a party. One of the members volunteered to host it, but then decided to invite other people who aren’t associated with the team.

The get-together is no longer a “team” party. Is it proper etiquette for someone who volunteered to host a party for a select group to invite her own additional guests?

GENTLE READER: No, but before she ruins the party, Miss Manners would like to check that we all know the score.

The team party was never going to be strictly members of the team, any more than non-players were barred from attendance at games. Even at practice, there might have been a coach, a groundskeeper and the guy with the keys to the clubhouse in attendance.

By similar logic, it is not fair to expect the hostess to lock the door to family members, spouses or the high school friend who is staying with her for the weekend.

The issue is whether the focus remains, as promised, on celebrating the team’s victories (or consoling their defeats). But she will agree with you that having everyone arrive to learn they are outnumbered is poor sportsmanship.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I took a friend to lunch. She looked at her watch at least 20 times during the meal. This made me nervous, like we were supposed to hurry up.

I finally realized her watch was displaying her incoming text messages. What should I say next time?

GENTLE READER: “Is everything OK?”

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I work for a small, family-run restaurant. The owner is from Ukraine. She is fluent in English, but speaks with a notable accent.

I am from the area the restaurant is located in, and I have lived here all of my life. Over the course of a month, I have had about five different patrons ask if I am related to my boss or if I am also from Ukraine "because of my accent."

I do not have one. I know that accents are often hard for the speaker to notice, but I feel like I would be aware if I had developed a Ukrainian accent thick enough to sound like it is my first language.

What exactly should I say when people ask? I’d like to stay silent or move on to the next part of the conversation, but often that’s not a viable thing to do in these exchanges.

GENTLE READER: Restaurant patrons should not be asking such questions, but Miss Manners understands that they do -- and that appearing to be offended or unfriendly can have adverse consequences for both the business and your employment.

The polite response is to say, in a bright, friendly way, "No, I'm from here" -- before moving on to restaurant business. This will not lessen your own annoyance at being asked, but if it ever-so-slightly embarrasses the patron, perhaps you will have saved the next employee from such unwanted attention.

(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, gentlereader@missmanners.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)