DEAR HARRIETTE: My roommate works out at 5 a.m. every day, which means that his alarm goes off at 4:30 a.m., and it’s been affecting my sleep in a major way. The noise alone is enough to jolt me out of my sleep, and by the time I finally manage to fall back to sleep, it’s almost time for me to get up for work.

I’ve tried everything I can think of to deal with it. I’ve used earplugs, I’ve tried white noise machines and I’ve even changed my sleep schedule in an attempt to go to bed earlier so I can get a solid few hours of rest before the alarm goes off. Nothing is working, and it’s affecting my mood, my productivity and even my health.

I don’t know how to approach my roommate about this issue. I can’t tell him that he can’t wake up early to work out -- it’s his routine and I don’t want to make him feel bad. At the same time, I feel like my right to get a decent night’s sleep has been completely compromised. How do I talk to my roommate about this without making him feel like he has to choose between his fitness and my sleep? -- Alarm Off

DEAR ALARM OFF: Speak to your roommate about his alarm. Explain that you think it’s great that he has such a rigorous and disciplined workout schedule, but his alarm is disrupting your sleep. Ask him if he can find another way to alert himself to get up. There are silent vibrating alarms that can be worn on the wrist for exactly this purpose. They are said to work for even heavy sleepers.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My friend keeps inviting me to work events where she’s way too busy to interact or catch up with me. To me, it feels like a thoughtless effort. I see her make time for other people outside of work -- quite often, actually. Whenever I bring it up and explain that I wish we could have more personal time outside of her workplace, which, no offense, is really not that interesting to me, she reminds me that she always includes me in everything she has going on.

I recognize that she is making great strides in her career currently, which is why I choose to show up and support her, but it doesn’t feel much like friendship anymore. Should I try to be more understanding? Or is it possible that she simply doesn’t want to do other activities with me? -- Friends to Associates

DEAR FRIENDS TO ASSOCIATES: Assess the situation. Do you gain any value at all from attending your friend’s work events? Do you meet interesting people or make meaningful contacts? Do you help your friend in her career climb? If so, by all means continue to accept her invitations and make the most of the experiences.

Right now, your friend is climbing the ladder of her career and not paying as close attention as you would prefer. Give her grace. Find other friends who can fill the void. Notice over time if she comes back around.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m a mother of twin daughters who are graduating from high school this year and preparing to head off to college. They both dreamed of going to the University of Notre Dame, and they worked hard throughout high school to make it happen. When the acceptance letters came in, only one of them made it. The other, unfortunately, did not. She was devastated. We encouraged her to enroll in a local community college with the plan to transfer to Notre Dame in a year or two if things go well. She agreed to this, but ever since the decisions came out, there’s been a lot of tension in our home. The daughter who got in is trying not to make a big deal out of it, but she’s obviously excited and proud. The one who didn’t get in feels left behind, and I can tell she’s battling feelings of rejection, jealousy and low self-worth. They’ve been snapping at each other more often and keeping their distance. How can I support them both in this difficult transition without adding more pressure or making one feel smaller than the other? -- Twin Blues

DEAR TWIN BLUES: Did your daughter apply to any other schools? Colleges are so competitive that it is wise to cast a wide net so that you have choices. If she has any other acceptance offers, encourage her to focus on those. If not, community college for sure -- but not necessarily with her only goal being a transfer to Notre Dame. What is she interested in? What schools specialize in those passions? This may be a pivotal moment for both of them to gain some independence from each other. Yes, it will be hard at first, but not going to the same school may turn out to be exactly what they need.

Meanwhile, encourage your daughter to think about her future and plot out a plan. Now is the time to take charge of her life.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I think my husband has decided to convert to a new religion. He hasn’t come out and said it officially, but I see some of the books he’s reading, certain things he’s cut out of his diet and holidays he no longer celebrates. We’ve been married for about three years, and we’ve always been religious people, but for as long as we’ve known each other, we had practiced the same faith and shared the same beliefs.

Before we got married, we discussed and agreed on what things we would teach our children and what things we would allow them to figure out on their own. Now that he’s converting, I am worried about our son and what that means for him. I think my husband has the same concern, and that is what has been keeping him from telling me explicitly about his new faith. What should I do? -- Family Faith

DEAR FAMILY FAITH: I can see that you are afraid, but now is the time to speak up. Tell your husband that you have noticed different patterns in his practices and faith. Ask him what is going on and whether he is considering converting to a religion that is different from what the two of you practiced together. Be genuinely curious; this will allow him to open up with less trepidation. If it is true, you will have to figure out how to stay with him when he's actively pursuing another way of engaging the world.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I was out for a walk with my dog when out of nowhere, my neighbor’s dog came charging toward us. He had slipped out of his collar and was clearly not under control. He lunged at me and my dog, growling and snapping. I had to shield my dog and myself, and for a moment, I genuinely thought we were going to get seriously hurt.

What shocked me almost as much as the attack itself was my neighbor’s reaction. He just stood there, frozen, doing absolutely nothing to intervene. He didn’t call the dog back, didn’t run over, didn’t even speak. Eventually, the dog calmed down and ran back to him, but I was left angry and confused. I had a few scratches, but thankfully nothing major, and my dog wasn’t seriously injured either; it could have been much worse.

Since then, I haven’t spoken to my neighbor about the incident because I’m honestly not sure what to say. I don’t want to escalate things, but I also feel like I deserve some kind of acknowledgment or apology. Should I confront my neighbor? -- Bad Dog

DEAR BAD DOG: You must speak to your neighbor. State how frightened you were when his dog charged at you and your dog. Tell him you are surprised and disappointed that he didn’t do anything in the moment or reach out to make sure you were OK or to apologize for the incident. Acknowledge that it seemed the dog had somehow gotten free of his collar, so you know the neighbor wasn’t intentionally negligent, but you still feel unsettled with his lack of closure. Make sure he has a plan for if this happens again.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My 4-year-old nephew has experienced a lot of death in his young life. Recently, he lost his paternal grandmother, and his maternal grandmother is near her end. A close neighbor friend, a young woman, lost her battle to breast cancer as well.

My nephew is asking lots of questions, which makes sense, but it’s hard to know what to tell him. His parents are doing a good job when they talk to him, but recently he asked me if I was going to die. My knee-jerk reaction was to say no, but I felt like I was insulting him by saying that. He is a kid, but he’s genuinely curious. What is the right thing to say in this situation? -- Death Talk

DEAR DEATH TALK: Everyone dies. That’s a fact, so saying otherwise is dishonest and can lead to confusion. When your nephew brings up this topic again, ask him what he’s thinking about. It is likely that his thoughts have led him to a specific situation, conflict or activity. React to that rather than getting defensive. Tell him that everybody dies at some point; most people live to be old, but some, like his neighbor, go sooner. Tell him death is nothing to be afraid of -- it’s a stage in the life cycle. A book that can support your nephew is “My Grief Comfort Book: Creative Activities To Help Kids Cope With Loss and Keep Memories Alive” by Brie Overton.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)